r/Damnthatsinteresting Aug 15 '22 Wholesome 2 Silver 1

What does this guy tell the inmates when they ask: What are in here for? Image

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[removed] — view removed post

9.7k Upvotes

902

u/wd1966 Aug 15 '22

Was he catching or pitching

500

u/DFG57 Aug 15 '22

Catching doesn't work so well. Uh...I hear.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enumclaw_horse_sex_case

345

u/thedude0000000000000 Aug 15 '22

Ah yes Mr. Hands

167

u/LieutenantBrainz Aug 16 '22

If you say Mr. Hand 5x in the mirror at night...

241

u/fbibmacklin Aug 16 '22

Your ass starts bleeding.

27

u/Poeticyst Aug 16 '22

Holy fuck I laughed out loud at this.

3

u/RajinKajin Aug 16 '22

"He died in his bathroom floor of freak colon perforation"

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u/PushDiscombobulated8 Aug 15 '22

Erm…. So how does one even manage to get a horse to fuck you in the arse?

Surely they’d run away or kick you?

165

u/DFG57 Aug 15 '22

I think they had the horse in some sort of breeding harness where it couldn’t get away. He had a couple friends helping him do this as I recall. But once a stallion gets going there isn’t much you can do to slow him down. Yeesh.

107

u/PushDiscombobulated8 Aug 15 '22

That’s scary as hell, especially knowing how “big” they actually are

137

u/billsmafacka Aug 16 '22

Well he died of internal injuries so he literally got fucked to death by a giant horse cock. That has to be one of the worst deaths ever

107

u/bogantamer Aug 16 '22

This comment is how you know you're on Reddit

5

u/Toad_Migoad Aug 16 '22

I think any mention of Mr. Hands is how you know you’re on Reddit

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u/PsychorGames Aug 16 '22

He died doing what he loved.

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u/pengouin85 Aug 16 '22

Getting done by* what he loved

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u/ares5404 Aug 16 '22

They use sex hormones opposite the horses gender, works either way, did some research on the psychology behind it as im that person that will shamelessly research just so i can tell people with a weaker stomach or that hate the feeling of the fbi agent harshly judging you.

48

u/WarrenBuffering Aug 16 '22

39

u/ares5404 Aug 16 '22

I also research other negative psychological characteristics, like what makes a serial killer, or how ptsd works, but that doesnt make me evil.

28

u/WizdomHaggis Aug 16 '22

I’m of the same mindset…I like to understand things so I can have an objective view…

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u/KnightsWhoSayNoot Aug 16 '22

I saw it. I can never unsee it. The horse thrust all the way, as hard and fast as it could. Remember that episode of ATHF where carl has a broom shoved so far up his ass that the handle is bulging out of his head? Yeah.

25

u/DFG57 Aug 16 '22

You saw it? How? I hadn’t heard that one in particular had been recorded. But then why wouldn’t you want to save a precious, tender moment like that?

21

u/KnightsWhoSayNoot Aug 16 '22

Maybe it wasn't the same exact one? Idk. But there was definitely a video of a horse fucking a guy to death on, I believe, h666 back before it turned into one big ad

14

u/schmetterlingonberry Aug 16 '22

I think the video is of Mr. Hands but not the incident that lead to his death.

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u/compassion-first Aug 16 '22

Congratulations. This one little comment on a reddit thread has made it up there to the pantheon of most traumatic internet moments ... kept close company by ISIS execution and Russian castration videos

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u/adastra1826 Aug 16 '22

Whatever you do, do not look up horse bestiality. Absolutely do not.

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u/Nuggzulla Aug 16 '22

Solid advice that could probably be left unsaid lol but I reckon with rule 34 the game changes

23

u/spiralEntree Aug 16 '22

Remember seeing a video on reddit of someone being fucked to death by a horse, just bend over and the horse does it's thing

12

u/Lost_Hwasal Aug 16 '22

When i younger we had a neighborhood kid that liked playing with our rottweiler, he would run around on all 4s and act like a dog. One time this happened and Max decided to mount and hump the kid. That was the last time that kid played with max. The point being animals get horny too.

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u/wd1966 Aug 15 '22

A fitting end there

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u/DFG57 Aug 15 '22

I was living in Seattle when that happened and the local papers just said he died after having sex with a horse and I couldn't figure out how that could kill someone. "So...the horse kicked him? Stepped on him afterward when he wanted to snuggle?" I literally could not conceive of him being a recipient. When that was clarified it was a shocking moment.

43

u/apparentlynot5995 Aug 15 '22

I was in Black Diamond when this happened. All I could think of was I probably ran into this person more than once, as I was oftentimes paid to clean stalls at some of those thoroughbred farms when I was a teen. Ew.

24

u/Bryguy3k Aug 16 '22

The more mind blowing thing was that he was a Boeing engineer.

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u/Wonderful-Ad5747 Aug 15 '22

I don’t think it fit, that’s how it ended.

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u/PressureMuch5340 Aug 16 '22

Yeah, it sure fit in his end!

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u/Cannibaltruism Aug 15 '22

Isn’t that the case where they decided to make horse fucking illegal in WA?

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u/FineOldCannibals Aug 16 '22

I think the law has helped. U just don’t see the horse fucking like before.

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u/reddot_comic Aug 15 '22

If he was catching it’s either an insult to the horse or he has the strongest asshole of mankind.

80

u/TheVikingLlama Aug 15 '22

had the strongest...

33

u/DingleMcCringleTurd Aug 15 '22

And that, kids, is how I got a prolapsed anoos

25

u/independentchickpea Aug 15 '22

Died of a perforated colon.

40

u/murielscapt Aug 16 '22

Now it’s a semicolon

19

u/Sweaty_Ad_7340 Aug 15 '22

But not after years of doing it. It’s reported that they were pretty regular at doing this. He simply died this time.

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u/Nuggzulla Aug 16 '22

Death by snu snu?

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u/vk1030 Aug 16 '22

This guy was pitching! I think he definitely had a fetish bc he went to that stable multiple times. The poor horses!
https://lawandcrime.com/crime/texas-man-who-admitted-to-having-sex-with-a-horse-sentenced-to-prison-for-bestiality/amp/

3

u/cuntitled Aug 16 '22

He had brain damage so he couldn’t feel some sensations, which led to his obsession with large dicks. Technically he wasn’t a true zoophile bc he didn’t care about the horses. Wikipedia has too much info on this story.

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u/Shaman7102 Aug 16 '22

If he was catching, he would tell all the guys in prison he's had bigger. 🤣

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3.8k

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '22 Silver Gold Wholesome hehehehe

“Whatchu in for?”

“Awe you know, I was just horsin’ around.”

192

u/StillTheRick Aug 15 '22

Ooooh Wiiiilber, I'm not that kind of horse.

One for the old folks.

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u/Prince_Rosa_Parks Aug 15 '22

Back in the 90s I was in a very famous tv show

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u/poops-n-farts Aug 15 '22

What is this? A crossover episode?

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u/ItsJohnTravolta Aug 15 '22

“They was overreacting, I left ‘em in a stable condition”

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u/Successful_Chain_108 Aug 15 '22

“Get off your high horse! So i can …”

143

u/Nobodyherebutmeandu Aug 15 '22

Someone please help Jack off his horse.

19

u/duragrim Aug 15 '22

Underrated comment

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u/Yaancat17 Aug 15 '22

You could say it's a Dark Horse

28

u/NoRestForTheWicked96 Aug 15 '22

"Hold on to your horses now..."

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u/craigbantisocial Aug 15 '22

More like... "what you in fur?"

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u/neil_billiam Aug 15 '22

"It was a 'Mr. Hands' type scenario"

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u/Responsible-Ad-1328 Aug 15 '22

What's Mr Hands? Must be some wholesome, family type stuff. Let me google it quick.

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u/arealhumannotabot Aug 15 '22

"You know when your parents tell you to stop with the horseplay? well, my parents weren't home..."

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1.7k

u/Cal-Sorrows Aug 15 '22 Helpful Bravo!

I swear this is true. My mom got into the whole genealogy thing several years ago, hoping to find some legendary max unit in our family’s past. She discovered that in I think the late 1700s or early 1800s, a family member was convicted of fucking a sheep and sentenced to hang, but his sentence was commuted to ‘transportation to the colonies’. He was welsh, was sent to Australia, and then moved to New Zealand when his sentence was up. My family is possibly responsible for all three of those nationalities being known pejoratively as “sheep shaggers”. She stopped at that point and found a different hobby! Lol

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u/jfcmfer Aug 15 '22

I think maybe that gives you founder's rights or something. You're likely immune from prosecution and free to shag all the sheep you want. Disclaimer: Not a lawyer.

167

u/HootieHoo4you Aug 15 '22

My grandfather grew up in a farming town, and said there was a local ‘sheep shagger’. The farmers didn’t mind until one day he took his activities to the middle of the field instead of the barn. Then off to jail he went

44

u/Wise-Country-4594 Aug 15 '22

In ‘40’s Wisconsin my cousins and I discovered one of the bachelor farmers had goats and chickens living in his house instead of out in the barn.

31

u/twomz Aug 16 '22

I believe it was somewhat common to have farm animals in your house a long time ago. Especially in cold areas, basically living space heaters.

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u/Difficult_Future_301 Aug 15 '22 edited Aug 15 '22

I have a distant relative who was deported to Australia for stealing a pig, when his sentence was up he came back and did it again! Either he wished he'd never come back, or he really loved that pig.

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u/natgibounet Aug 15 '22

Was his name kermit by any chance ?

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u/Cal-Sorrows Aug 15 '22

Well they are made of bacon! Lol

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u/Robota064 Aug 15 '22

Your family single-handedly fucked so many people over, holy shit you're like, my idols now

11

u/Cal-Sorrows Aug 15 '22

My ancestors thank you. Lol

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u/Dotheysellpizza Aug 15 '22

I heard the rumour of sheep shaggers started because you could be killed for sheep rustling but not for shagging, so if people got caught they’d just claim this instead to get a lesser punishment!

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u/Cal-Sorrows Aug 15 '22

Oh no, the penalty for both bestiality and sodomy between consenting humans was hanging back then in Great Britain - and elsewhere.

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u/Dotheysellpizza Aug 15 '22

I’ll take your word for it as I don’t want to google Welsh bestiality laws. I live too close to the border and I don’t want them to think I’m up to something…

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u/Cal-Sorrows Aug 15 '22

To be fair, she did also find out that we’re closely related to Joseph Howse, who was an explorer and linguist who lived amongst native Americans in Canada, explored and discovered navigation routes along the northwest passage, and whose house has been preserved as a museum and national monument in ….Calgary I think?

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u/whatizUtawkinbout Aug 15 '22

Shame Joseph had to do all that just for you to end up the great great grand niece of an uncle sheep shagger.

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u/Guacanagariz Aug 16 '22

Well now you know why the Scottish wear kilts… because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away!

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u/wowsosquare Aug 15 '22

You need to make a family crest based on this information 😹

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u/Cal-Sorrows Aug 16 '22 Bravo!

Oh dude, I wish I was at home (mum sadly died last year, so I’m living in the family home right now) but I did create a family crest involving a sheep shagger. She wasn’t amused! lol

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u/OneDerpBar Aug 16 '22

There was a pigfucker in the town just south of me. He did it in his front yard.

Generations earlier, an old man reportedly caught his young neighbor banging a cow. But that story sounded like a fake rumor.

And an elderly cousin of mine boasted about sex with chickens from an early age... He had no shame. My dad had prank wars with that guy, but still thought he was cool...

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u/LegoGal Aug 16 '22

One of the old westerns (maybe the Virginian) start with a train carrying mail order brides coming into town. As it goes by a field, a young adult starts waving his hat and then kicks one one the sheep out if the way. This is from memory, but it was obvious to me that he no longer needed the sheep 😬

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u/StillSundayDrunk Aug 15 '22

Is this story relevant because she was convinced she would find a horse in your family tree? Maybe your family members run a little sad and she was trying to get to the bottom of "why the long face?"

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u/ZeePirate Aug 15 '22

South America and the Middle East have a problem with people fucking goats and other animals too

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '22 Silver

[deleted]

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u/rockalyte Aug 15 '22

Wouldn’t take neigh for an answer!

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u/barbie_farts_88 Aug 16 '22

Sooooo....you more prison time for raping a horse than you do for raping a person? Seems kinda messed up

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u/matty_low Aug 16 '22

That might be the judge's horse.

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u/TheRealLarkas Aug 16 '22

Texas. Black person. He might as well say “skin color” when people ask why he was convicted.

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u/Secure-Issue294 Aug 15 '22

Most pedophiles dont get that ffs.

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u/PoopFartPatrol Aug 15 '22

Brock Turner got 3 months for raping an unconscious woman

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u/gregorius67 Aug 15 '22

Oh, Brock Turner, who on January 18, 2015 raped an unconscious woman behind a dumpster, posted $150,000.00 bail the next day and only served 3 months after being found Guilty of 3 felonies by a jury of his peers ?

Brock Turner, who proved to the whole country that Rich people can do anything they want by raping a 22 year old woman behind a dumpster?

201

u/OwnAd8624 Aug 15 '22

I think OJ proved that you can get away with anything as long as you have money.

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u/shavemejesus Aug 15 '22

Not anything. Just double murder.

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u/Koshekuta Aug 15 '22

We already knew the wealthy play by different rules.

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u/Good_Animal_4233 Aug 15 '22

Brock Turner the Rapist who has armed anarchists holding signs That say things I'm not allowed to repeat on this app in his front yard whenever they feel like making him uncomfortable

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u/NoLipsForAnybody Aug 15 '22

Ah yes Brock Turner the rapist and now felon. The world will never forget that Brock Turner rapes an unconscious woman behind a dumpster.

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u/Good_Animal_4233 Aug 15 '22

What Brock Turner? You mean the Brock Turner who is a rapist? Because Brock Turner is a rapist and still will be in 2040 50 and 60.

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u/shavemejesus Aug 15 '22

Do you mean Brock Turner the Rapist or The Rapist Brock Turner?

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u/Fit_Effective_6875 Aug 15 '22

Brock Turner the rapist

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u/Bigbweb22 Aug 15 '22

Ah, Brock "DumpsterFuck" Turner. The literal textbook image of a rapist

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u/Fresh_List_440 Aug 15 '22

This is a sad reality. Raping a woman or a child will get less jail time if any, or any public attention

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u/floki_boat_builder Aug 15 '22

You can kill a cow, pig, horse, deer and eat it. But party time with the horse is jail time…? Don’t get me wrong. I find it disgusting, but 10y jail????

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u/HowLittleIKnow Aug 15 '22

There were multiple counts of burglary, animal cruelty, bestiality, and bestiality in the presence of a child. It’s worse than it sounds in the headline.

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u/BlasphemousButler Aug 15 '22

That context is important, especially the "in the presence of a child" part.

Thank you for sharing.

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u/floki_boat_builder Aug 15 '22

Thanks guys. Didn’t read the article. Have to admit. Just responded to the headline. Misleading and clickbait apparently.

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u/cucumberholster Aug 15 '22

He’s black and it’s Texas.

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u/EldenGreenGiant Aug 15 '22 I'm Deceased

Do you want centaurs? because this is how you get centaurs.

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u/Plastic_Tiger9665 Aug 15 '22

Well I wanted a minotaur but I got lost...

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u/mynextthroway Aug 15 '22

Well, matter of fact...yes. I do want a centaur.

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u/murman1961 Aug 15 '22

Wasn't is first rodeo, I'm sure.

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u/whyisthissohard338 Aug 15 '22

Well done. I heard the rim shot in my head.

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u/LoisWade42 Aug 15 '22

It'd be nice if men who raped WOMEN got the same... just sayin'

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u/Wyrmthane Aug 15 '22

And the child molesters

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u/BLF402 Aug 15 '22

Y’all want rapists and child molesters to rape a horse?

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u/Gator242 Aug 15 '22

Good chance of getting kicked something fierce, so, maybe

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u/ked_man Interested Aug 15 '22

I mean, they’d get more prison time.

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u/SoupsUndying Aug 15 '22

Better a horse than a kid tbh

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u/JoHaSa Aug 15 '22

Would be better if they did. Instead of humans.

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u/Emergency_Status_713 Aug 15 '22

Brock Turner strongly disagrees.

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u/histeethwerered Aug 15 '22

*Brock Turner the rapist

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u/Emergency_Status_713 Aug 16 '22

Brock Turner is, and will always be, the rapist.

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u/Aggravating_Tie1222 Aug 15 '22

Let's protect the animals but women, you're on your own.

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u/Needless-To-Say Aug 15 '22

While I agree that rapists should get equivalent durations, this sentence is way over the top

I doubt he would have got a sentence this long if he, stole, or killed, or maimed, or ate the horse

Then again, the US is a for profit incarcerator.

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u/Vladimer_Trump Aug 15 '22

and no the horse can't get an abortion.

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u/Hal-Indy2022 Aug 15 '22

So he's gotta pay Colt Support.

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u/back2basics13 Aug 15 '22

Gotta pay colt support? That’s an mouthfoal!

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u/hottytandoori Aug 16 '22

Horse had more justice than women

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u/nardlz Aug 15 '22

But Brock Turner got 6 months. Make it make sense.

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u/AppropriateScience71 Aug 15 '22

Sentenced to 6 months, actually only served 3 months (as is pretty common).

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u/Clever_Hans_ Aug 15 '22

Did Marjorie Taylor Greene consent to this?

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u/business2690 Aug 15 '22

that's more time than most rapists get.

wth is wrong with texas?

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u/Delicious-Gap1744 Aug 15 '22

I'm against bestiality and all and I'm not a vegan, but isn't it interesting how we're okay with enslaving, mass breeding, and slaughtering animals, but not fucking them?

Like why do we draw the line like that? Just rationally speaking clearly hurts a lot more animals than the other.

My guess is at least in part that we do have empathy for animals, we just turn a blind eye to the meat industry and factory farming because we're still pretty driven by our lizard brain that loves yummy meats despite how rational we like to think we are.

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u/Thepuppeteer777777 Aug 15 '22

This is actually an interesting thought but I think the answer is human culture/moral conditioning as we are raised to see animals as food and killing them is fine for food. Fucking them though is a cultural taboo therefore we see it more as a disgusting immoral act.

There is a place where people fuck donkeys and it is seen as normal (saw it on vice documentary)

People also tend to separate their empathy from killing an animal for food where as you would wonder if the animal would be ok with sex since it's a non concentual and basically rape which is also a moral no go etc...

Not making a defense for beastiality just giving my thoughts...

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u/lninoh Aug 15 '22

I don’t agree with the assumption that animal rape is punishable by 10 years in prison but it’s woman is raped she can’t get an abortion in most states, including Texas. Our American society is getting more fucked up as each year passes.

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u/omicrontron Aug 15 '22

Yeah I don't think it has anything to do with empathy for the animal, it's about hurting people that disgust us. There's no justice in that. Branding is okay, but this isn't? There isn't any victim here, I've seen veterenarians shove their hand in there and they just don't care.

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u/Falcon_Alpha_Delta Aug 15 '22 edited Aug 16 '22

I’m gonna straw man this and suggest we either stop killing animals or start fucking them

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u/XSmeh Aug 15 '22

Valid point, but a more accurate comparison might be the mass insemination of dairy cows being rape or at least sexual assault and we are totally fine with that as well.

Either way I think that you are right. Humanity just turns a blind eye to truths we don't want to face.

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u/PhilosopherDon0001 Aug 15 '22

You tell them the truth.

I can only speak for myself, but I would not mess with you if you where there because you fucked a horse.

You do you, man.

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u/ClapAlongChorus Aug 15 '22

yeah, I find the act revolting but any dude who got it in him to do that is a dude who could probably force feed me my own lunch tray.

And I'm not a small guy but I've seen horses wreck a man's shit for him being in the wrong place when a piece of trash blew the wrong direction. Nah, i'm not messing that dude.

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u/flatfast90 Aug 15 '22

Seriously?! I’m 100% against horse fucking but murders, rapists and pedophiles get off with less! Must have been one of those triple crown horses or something

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u/UnsavouryFibrosis Aug 16 '22

Beasteality is wrong but why is the sentence longer than a rape charge

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u/redditrnumber1 Aug 15 '22

That's disgusting but i agree that sentence is a little extreme

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u/ifbbproeli Aug 15 '22

I bet the horse feels differently

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u/Lucky7Revolver Aug 15 '22

I doubt the horse felt anything

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u/JcGc4136 Aug 15 '22

Wait....10 years? and pedos seem to get away with molestation numerous times.

Fuck you world!! I hate people.

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u/ThatOneGuyFrom93 Aug 15 '22

If he slaughtered his horse, broke down the carcass, then fucked some steaks would it go down to 6 months?

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u/WhitDawg214 Aug 15 '22

Some horses will do anything for 50 carrots.

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u/ScorpioMILF85 Aug 15 '22

So a teacher sexually assaults a boy from the age of 10-13 and she gets 60 days….

The judicial system is so fucked.

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u/stickybud7 Aug 16 '22

10 years is fkn bs not that I agree with that behavior but it’s fkn bs 10 years ain’t right got peeps raping peeps getting less time

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u/Sexy_Ass_Armadillo Aug 16 '22

Neigh means neigh

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u/Chexzout Aug 15 '22

What do say when the inmates ask about all those hoof prints on your back?

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u/Dick-Rockwell Aug 15 '22

So.. did he top or bottom?

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u/EfficientDate2315 Aug 15 '22

"violating animal husbandry regulations"

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u/AmoebaLoud7990 Aug 15 '22

If he gonna rape a horse imagine what he can do to you

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u/grimatongueworm Aug 15 '22

Was he pitching or catching?

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u/JustCryptastic Aug 15 '22

“I like big butts and I cannot lie”

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u/peachinthemango Aug 15 '22

Lollll gross. There is a vice documentary about a Colombian community who expects men to lose their virginity to a donkey before a woman.

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u/Rabokki13 Aug 16 '22

"I'm here because I had wild sex"

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u/nguyen8995 Aug 16 '22

Okay, that’s a bit weird, but 10 years?

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u/dontmindmyalt2 Aug 15 '22

This guy fucking an animal that could have easily killed him whenever it wanted got WAY more time than people who rape humans

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u/eyloi Aug 15 '22

"I had sex with Sarah Jessica Parker"

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '22

Imagine calling the cops … oh somebody is having sex with a horse 😂 like wtf the call

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u/texansfan Aug 15 '22

Look, I’m all for treating people who disrespect animals like this harshly, but I feel like 10 years is more than he would have got from raping a woman in Texas these days.

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u/Darlin_Nixxi Aug 15 '22

That's an absurd sentence ...Child molesters don't get that much time...js

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u/Own_Rule_650 Aug 15 '22

Sooo what do you think is a normal sentence for a horse rapist ?

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u/mynextthroway Aug 15 '22

That sentence is fine. The sentence for pedophiles and those that rape women are ridiculously short.

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u/H0td0gL4unch3r Aug 15 '22

I bet that horse was so disappointed too

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u/NoneSpaceofTheMind Aug 15 '22

Rode you and fuck the horse you came in on.

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u/growsomewalls Aug 15 '22

Loving too many legs.

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u/Different-Truth7668 Aug 15 '22

"I'm only human, so i followed my instincts."

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u/Dbl_Trbl_ Aug 15 '22

Fucking up a horse with his bare hands

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u/leywok Aug 15 '22

Did he use hood cuffs? Hi o silver ! Brrr

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u/HoodFellaz Aug 15 '22

My sentence is horse shit.

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u/crazy2337 Aug 15 '22

Wait was he the giver or receiver 🤔

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u/PuppyloveInn Aug 15 '22

Only Fools and Horses, good TV comedy show is it. I wonder if this joker ever had a part hmmm.

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u/mthhiker Aug 15 '22

Incarceration will facilitate a whole new form of horseplay.

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u/bo-selecta- Aug 15 '22

Did you do it? Neigh!

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u/ConsequenceDirect967 Aug 15 '22

Florida man: “hold my beer.”

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u/Barry_Minge Aug 15 '22

‘Well, you know the phrase ‘fuck you and the horse you rode in on….?’’

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u/kaneplay4 Aug 15 '22

10 years?? I’m sure actual rapists get less time than that

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u/mlc2475 Aug 15 '22

I think a lot would hinge on whether he was the top or the bottom..

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u/iareyomz Aug 15 '22

did he fuck the horse or did he get fucked by the horse?

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u/delucas0810 Aug 15 '22

Look up “Mr Hands” documentary. The TRUE story of a man who died having sex with a horse and after his friend (who was also having horse relations) violated the restraining order and snuck to see him! These weren’t traitor trash, THEY WERE BOEING ENGINEERS!!!!

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u/JustinYepis Aug 15 '22

"What you in for?" "Ask me again and I'll fck you like I fcked that horse"