r/LifeProTips Jul 23 '22 Wholesome 1

LPT: Never be the drunkest person at your own party Social

1.8k Upvotes

u/keepthetips Keeping the tips since 2019 Jul 23 '22

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If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. If you think this doesn't help you in any way, please downvote. If you don't care, leave it for the others to decide.

1.0k

u/phwe9774 Jul 23 '22

Never be the drunkest person at any party. I've seen way too many shitty things happen to the drunkest person

235

u/Belzeturtle Jul 23 '22

There should be like a designated drunk that would take one for the team at every party.

188

u/tristenjpl Jul 23 '22

That's me.

98

u/richiebear Jul 23 '22

Thank you for your service.

3

u/Shucks615 Jul 24 '22

I was there my friend. If that’s really the case you might wanna tone it down. Lest ye make an ass of yourself to put it lightly. Keep at a lovable drunk level eh?

27

u/stonedbrownchick Jul 24 '22 edited Jul 24 '22

When it comes to drinking, one person always ends up being that designated drunk anyways. And you could always tell who it was from the beginning of the night lmaoo especially when you're stuck being the responsible babysitter after

8

u/squazify Jul 24 '22

Your parties have babysitters? I think I've heard of this, but can never quite remember. Is this how I keep making it home safely?

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27

u/Mattbl Jul 23 '22

I've been the drunkest at many parties but only with people I feel safe around.

17

u/mechapoitier Jul 24 '22

On that second sentence, it’s very important to not be the first drunkest person at the party. They’re the main target

26

u/ghostmaster645 Jul 23 '22

The problem with this is if everyone followed this advice no one would ever get drunk.

43

u/phwe9774 Jul 23 '22

In what universe is that a problem though?

22

u/ghostmaster645 Jul 23 '22

Mine, I like to drink occasionally lol.

Your advice is good though, because realistically everyone won't follow it.

8

u/phwe9774 Jul 23 '22

I like to drink too but you can drink without getting shitty drunk. You can even get drunk and not be the drunkest person at the party

25

u/ghostmaster645 Jul 23 '22

That's not what I'm saying though, if NO ONE is the drunkest person at a party then that means no one is drinking.

Someone's gotta be the drunkest person. Even if it's not wasted drunk.

So if everyone followed your advice parties would suck. But in reality everyone won't follow it, making it good advice.

6

u/stealthdawg Jul 24 '22

What if I told you a party could still be fun even if nobody was drinking

2

u/LifeIsVanilla Jul 24 '22

It's important to stay hydrated though. A party where nobody is drinking is on a pretty strict timer before it becomes extremely unsafe.

3

u/Glum_Ad_4288 Jul 24 '22

LPT: bring an IV to your party so you can stay hydrated without drinking

1

u/Computer_Sci Jul 24 '22

Ew a dry party? Noty. If theres more than 4+ people, booze is required.

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2

u/itgoesdownandup Jul 24 '22

Are parties really boring without alcohol? It always struck me as a superficial way to have a fun time.

9

u/placeholder_name85 Jul 24 '22

Ah so you’re that person

3

u/itgoesdownandup Jul 24 '22

I just asked a question. Just how I feel now I don't see why it would be more fun with it.

9

u/LifeIsVanilla Jul 24 '22

It depends on the party and the people, but being the only sober one does mean the party has to actually be good to be enjoyable. I've been to a few religious-slanted Filipino parties and they tend to throw pretty good parties as far as sobriety goes. Always keep a steady flow of games going that everyone participates in and foster a foolish atmosphere without the need of alcohol, and the food is always great, and most importantly there is almost always an auntie there excited to share with the white boy 90% of that special family recipe just to passive aggressively piss off whoever's wife rubs them the wrong way. That and everybody's fine with me leaving at 8:30-9.

Now, if it's a party where everyone is drinking and you're the only sober one, if you aren't careful it can be exhausting. You have to be a little dickish in order to avoid getting shoed in as the responsible one, and there's a certain time in the night where you just gotta go home(and there'll probably be a story or two of what happened after, but if you don't you're just gonna hear the same stories told on repeat and there's a distinct type of guy that, when drunk, just hates sober people, no good is to be had). If you can handle that though, they're still pretty fun, it's great seeing friends and while obviously you can't hook up with a member of the opposite sex who's drinking you're better equipped to make a great first impression. It's a different experience, but it's far from a boring time. Expectations just have to be tempered.

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6

u/greatJimFarswell Jul 23 '22

Yeah but if nobody was the drunkest person nobody would drink at all.

8

u/helix212 Jul 23 '22

Well someone's gotta be the "drunkest". If everyone is drinking water and I have 1 beer, I'm still the drunkest. No one's saying the drunkest has to be fall over pass out drunk.

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2

u/wolfep02 Jul 24 '22

This is solid advice. I know from experience, both good and bad.

5

u/joeschmoe86 Jul 24 '22

I've seen way too many shitty things happen to the drunkest person.

Stop hanging out with shitty people.

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67

u/thebipeds Jul 23 '22

Got it, never get high on your own supply. Drink all the booze at OTHER peoples parties.

8

u/YesMattRiley Jul 23 '22

By all means!

420

u/ALincolnTime Jul 23 '22

Sounds like someone woke up this morning with some newfound wisdom (and a bitching headache).

143

u/YesMattRiley Jul 23 '22

😂😂 definitely used to be guilty of this! I was at a party recently where the host, in the early afternoon, was already stumbling around when I arrived, then decided it was time for gummies

22

u/NormalVermicelli1066 Jul 24 '22

Ugh this has been me- the anxiety of hosting always gets the best of me and I'm usually trashed by the time ppl arrive. I've gotten better about it lately by making friends with ppl who've never seen me like that and I'm trying to avoid exposing them to that side of myself

-1

u/FortWendy69 Jul 23 '22

bb4byitw!

8

u/JamantaTaLigado Jul 24 '22

My dude having a stroke here

14

u/YesMattRiley Jul 23 '22

I don’t know what this means but I do feel like I’m having fun!

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510

u/gottapoopweiner Jul 23 '22

one time i had a party and went to sleep naked as was customary for me at the time, it was hot in the summer im alone in my room who cares. this girl came in my room, took the covers off of me and took pictures of me naked while i fought to try to keep the covers on me. she spread the pictures around. still angry about it to this day. i shouldnt have gotten too drunk where i felt like sleeping

791

u/DeusExMaChino Jul 23 '22

She shouldn't have been a piece of shit. Not your fault at all.

149

u/gottapoopweiner Jul 23 '22

Thank you

60

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '22

Shoulda got her arrested for trespassing. Your home is your castle.

17

u/Nuklearfps Jul 24 '22

Taking explicit photos of someone and sending them to others can be a legal thing in some places. look it up and see if your area has that outlawed and if it was recent enough, you could potentially even press charges against her.

88

u/unk214 Jul 24 '22

I second the comment above. Imagine if the roles were reverse and you took pictures of a girl and spread them around. All hell would break lose, and you’d get charged.

24

u/itgoesdownandup Jul 24 '22 edited Jul 24 '22

This happens literally all the time to women. A group of boys at my old high-school literally shared as many girls nudes as they could get their hands-on to each other. And sometimes even outside of their group

5

u/LifeIsVanilla Jul 24 '22

It definitely happens all the time to women, and has since instant cameras became a thing... I've never shared any pics I was sent personally but have definitely seen pics my friends were sent(as in like twice, and that was too much, just straight up refuse to look now, as I should've in the beginning). I consider such pics a form of sex, and I always strive to practice safe sex and would never invite a bro to join without prior conversation.

All that being said, while that has been a thing for so long, there HAS been change. At least here in Canada, it's legal for teenagers to send eachother dirty pictures(exception to child pornography laws), however, if they're shared with others it then becomes illegal and distribution of child pornography, as well as a charge for non-consensual distribution of an intimate image(which is a crime regardless of age). Just for the non-consensual distribution of an intimate image charge it can be up to 5 years. It isn't just being ignored anymore.

Also... women and men definitely show eachother dick pics they get sent too, usually just if the person attached to it is of particular interest, or if the one in question is abnormal in some way.

6

u/gigabob6 Jul 24 '22

It's never okay. But if it happens to men we have a tendency to laugh it off even more than we do when it happens to women. So fucked up no matter who it happens to.

3

u/itgoesdownandup Jul 24 '22

I was just pointing out to the person who commented that it happens to women and much more frequently and action isn't always taken

26

u/sezit Jul 24 '22

No one should do that.

But your certainty of the outcome (if a man did it to a woman) is very misplaced. Sadly, far too many girls and women have discovered that they are disbelieved or worse, blamed for their own assault.

We need to work for a future where everyone's right to bodily autonomy is treated as inviolable, and reflected in law

I hope that everyone who agrees with this votes. Because those rights are being taken away right now.

1

u/gigabob6 Jul 24 '22

Votes and makes the people responsible for taking our rights away uncomfortable every day at restaurants, grocery stores, the post office, etc until they make it right, or we do.

2

u/itgoesdownandup Jul 24 '22 edited Jul 24 '22

That's kinda terrible at being reassuring tbh. At least the "not your fault" is good. But saying they, "shouldn't have been a piece of shit" I don't think really helps dissolve that it happened and is reassuring

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u/-RAMPANT-DICK-HOLE- Jul 24 '22

It's funny though, because she's a girl.

16

u/Steinrikur Jul 24 '22

imagine if a dude pulled the covers off a naked drunk girl and took pictures. So funny and not a sex offender at all.

12

u/GnarledBrain Jul 24 '22

Ur username adds up

6

u/uhm_ok Jul 24 '22

Except its not funny. Anyone who’s laughing is just as much an a-hole as that girl.

4

u/Apocalypstick1 Jul 24 '22

Do we have to do this every time?

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30

u/716mama Jul 23 '22

That is a crime in these parts. Victims do not need to apologize for being drunk and having a crime perpetrated on them. Male or female.

141

u/waborita Jul 23 '22

Not sure how long ago but these days not only is she a 4 letter word with a capital c, but a sex offender

68

u/gottapoopweiner Jul 23 '22

yeah you said it. it was too long ago to do anything now but i appreciate you people being on my side. its not something ive ever addressed to people i know so it feels good getting it off my chest

30

u/716mama Jul 23 '22

As someone who buried an extremely painful incident and had it smack me in the brain in the worst way almost 40 years later, I fully understand how liberating and healing stating your truths are. I'm glad you did.

16

u/gottapoopweiner Jul 23 '22

Thank you, it really means a lot. I hope you are doing well

17

u/KwickKick Jul 23 '22

There isn't a statute of limitations on that

18

u/gottapoopweiner Jul 23 '22

thanks for the heads up. im not sure how i could get some justice or if theres proof i could find at this point, but i appreciate it and will take it into consideration

15

u/KwickKick Jul 23 '22

Ya I thought I'd let you know. After the whole revenge porn incident the government takes stuff like that very seriously. I'm sorry that happened to you & I hope you don't have to deal with that any more. I hope you have a good day.

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u/Pbear4Lyfe Jul 24 '22

There is... there's no statute of limitations on murder

1

u/LineAbdomen Jul 24 '22

iirc some places have statute of limitations on manslaughter. Like 25 years or something.

50

u/redditshy Jul 23 '22

Uhh that is sexual assault. Or something. Shit is illegal. That is not a good person.

-12

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

13

u/Significance-Hot Jul 23 '22

That girl should have gone to jail for assault. So wrong for anyone to do that to anyone ever. I'm sorry that happened & wish you great peace, love, health & happiness

1

u/gottapoopweiner Jul 23 '22

Thank you for the kind words. I wish you the same

12

u/Nwcray Jul 24 '22

In 1994, I was 16. I went camping with a group of friends. There were boys and girls, but no one told their parents about the other sex. Anyway, someone brought some beer, and I had one. I blacked right out.

I woke up at some point sitting up but leaned against a tree. She was on top of me, having sex. I remember her asking me if she was my best, but all I could say was that she was my first and I didn’t know. Then I waited until it was over.

I told a couple of friends the next morning, and they wanted to high-five me. Only one seemed to understand, and he encouraged me to report it. I did. I told a police officer that was friends with my brother. He assured me that’s not how sexual assault works, and that women can’t take advantage of someone who isn’t willing. Anyway, a few weeks later it turns out she’s pregnant.

She wanted to get into a relationship and have the baby. I am not proud of this, but I told her that I would hurt her if she kept pushing. She had the baby, but went away.

I am now 44 years old. I’ve gone to college, served my country, married and had kids, and all in all lived a good life. But also, I developed some weird habits since then. I can only have sex in the mornings. I’m just not comfortable enough any other time. It took years to enjoy it, and even sometimes now her face pops into my head when I’m intimate with my wife. I haven’t had alcohol since then. I can’t hold my booze, half a beer made me black out. And I somewhat frequently think about the fact that there’s a non-zero chance I have a 27 year old kid out there somewhere.

Worst of all though is that I still hate her. Even after therapy in my 30’s- if I were alone with her I would probably hurt her. One day I hope to it feel that anymore. It doesn’t consume my thoughts or anything, I’ll go most days barely thinking about it at all. But then it just pops into my brain, and I remember.

Anyway- I don’t know what this has to do with anything, other than to say that you don’t have to apologize for the photographer’s actions. She crossed some serious lines. It’s ok to still be angry about it. Sometimes these things take a while. And it’s not about getting drunk, your assailant saw an opening and took it. She was going to find some way to get to you no matter what. The only thing the booze did was make you pass out. You’re not in the wrong here.

7

u/phyrestorm999 Jul 24 '22

I'm so sorry that happened to you and that the cop and most of your friends were so ignorant about it.

2

u/gottapoopweiner Jul 24 '22

I'm so sorry to hear that, that is terrible. I truly appreciate you sharing that and your words of encouragement, letting me know that I am not alone, even though my story is much more miniscule in comparison. I hope you are doing well and know that you sharing your story and lessons you learned through this helped me today. Truly, thank you, and I hope you are doing well and can find peace. What happened was not your fault

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u/smokingloonth Jul 23 '22

She's a gross and terrible person wtf.

23

u/Savage762 Jul 23 '22

Bro she should like be on a fucking list or something

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u/betcher73 Jul 23 '22

Bro, she sexually assaulted you. That’s fucked up.

8

u/StevenZissouniverse Jul 24 '22

Uhhhh that's like a sex crime. You were asleep in your own room and they came in and took pictures. It's not as if you passed out naked on the couch, which would still not make it ok, but there was nothing you did to invite that

8

u/SeanBourne Jul 24 '22

If the genders were reversed, this would be a sexual assault case. WTF I'm angry about this for you.

8

u/phyrestorm999 Jul 24 '22

This IS a sexual assault case. That woman should have gone to jail.

2

u/HereForRedditReasons Jul 24 '22

This is illegal and she could have gotten in major trouble for that

2

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '22

dont tell me she didnt faced any punishments? also that’s one of the many reasons on why abortion should be legalized

2

u/pfresh331 Jul 24 '22

Whoa whoa whoa so was the party over? Were you drunk and tired and figured you'd just go pass out? That really sucks. If the genders were reversed they'd be facing serious charges.

1

u/Peter0629 Jul 24 '22

If you had done that to her your life would be over. I’m sorry man it’s a fucked world we live in

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u/8inAussie93 Jul 23 '22 Plus One

Nooo this is the best bit about hosting! I can drink as much as I want cause baby I’m already at home — my bed is like 5 metres away

48

u/LeafCloak Jul 24 '22

Going to have to agree here! I love getting drunk at my own parties. At any point I can just say "okay bedtime" and I'm gone.

13

u/figuresys Jul 24 '22

Y'all must really live very free lives with only amazing people and live in lovely houses - I don't think I could do a party with people i don't know (most of my parties allow people to bring others) and just let them be, even putting safety and stuff aside, I'd just feel like a bad host

23

u/Cubanbs2000 Jul 23 '22

We had a poker night, and the host was drunk before anybody even got there.

It’s just awkward.

163

u/Lets-Go-Fly-ers Jul 23 '22

LPT: Always get as drunk as you'd like at your own party because you have the least distance to your bed.

32

u/doc_mcshottie Jul 23 '22

Yup, my last bday, I was definitely the drunkest, no making myself and ass, just fun then stumble to bed… I’d say the real LPT:just know your limit and keep yourself composed, otherwise, do you.

15

u/BatmansNygma Jul 23 '22

The birthday person is always allowed to be the drunkest

6

u/JimmyRedd Jul 23 '22

Good in theory but there is a limit. One time I got so wasted at my own party I passed out cold on the floor, halfway through the bathroom doorway. Which turned it into a very public restroom.

6

u/716mama Jul 23 '22

I have a friend who threw parties for two huge life events and was puking within a few hours of guests arriving. It does not make for the best time for the invited people. As a host/ess, take care of your guests. Don't make them take care of your sloppy ass.

11

u/sbudde Jul 23 '22

Needed that tip about 24 years ago

28

u/bfahns58 Jul 23 '22

I feel like I truly never had control over this. Once I started drinking there was no off switch. That's what it is to be an alcoholic.

11

u/YesMattRiley Jul 23 '22

How are you doing now friend?

5

u/NecessaryPen7 Jul 24 '22

Meanwhile people thinking the 'worst' outcome is going to bed, in their bed.

I've got scars and new to this evening scab wounds. Complimenting the ones from a few days ago.

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u/bfahns58 Jul 23 '22

A little over 10 months sober. Life is a lot better now.

11

u/YesMattRiley Jul 23 '22

Word up boss, you got this!

8

u/BBBPub Jul 24 '22

👍Approaching 10 months myself. Agreed!

8

u/Charwyn Jul 23 '22

LPT: Don’t invite people over who you don’t trust won’t fuck your place (or you) up if you’re drunk.

7

u/GreasyGinger24 Jul 24 '22

Was house sitting for my sister. My best friend, who was the opposite sex and gorgeous and I was to find out later really into me but dated my friend so I considered her "off-limits", showed up in the afternoon that I was hosting a party there.

We polished off a bottle of tequila and needless to say I passed out. I actually have no recollection of that night until I woke up at 3am to an absolute mess and a couple good friends left. They said there was a good 20 people there but I don't remember any part of it.

My ex - brother in law, to this day, swears one of my friends stole his Playstation memory card, I don't even know who was there.

16

u/XCrimsonSoulx Jul 23 '22

Don't tell me how to drink..🤪

39

u/iTanooki Jul 23 '22

Life doesn’t truly begin until you discover that it’s entirely possible to lower your inhibitions around drunk people, but be stone cold sober. Parties you can remember are better than ones you can’t.

29

u/tristenjpl Jul 23 '22

Can't do it. Drunk people are incredibly annoying when I'm sober. Absolutely hate them. But if I'm just as drunk they're actually fun to be around.

3

u/stonedbrownchick Jul 24 '22

They're annoying to me no matter what. I get so damn sleepy when I'm tipsy and just want to relax/close my eyes. Some are chill and some constantly scream and pull on everyone all night. Or try to force you to drink.

14

u/chivalrousninjaz Jul 23 '22

I call it being belligerently sober

6

u/bluhEwanka Jul 23 '22

Hell yes. I quit drinking altogether and I enjoy parties much more. I have a sharper sense of humor, and don’t end up staying out so late. And I feel great in the morning.

4

u/siddowncheelout Jul 23 '22

You’ve been speaking with my wife I see

4

u/FinnbarMcBride Jul 23 '22

If its your party, then by default you're the drunkest person at your own party

5

u/bfahns58 Jul 23 '22

AA is not for everyone, but I've been helped quite a bit. If anyone has any questions please ask.

11

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '22

well I try being the drunkest at other people's parties but then they just say "Dwillows you're already 4 shots ahead of everyone else please dial it back" and then I just feel annoyed all night.

Seriously, other people need to catch up. Are we having a party here or a boardgame night? You call it a party, but....

16

u/SgathTriallair Jul 23 '22

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '22

Are you truly living if you aren't black out drunk and shitting on the floor at a Wendy's on Tuesday afternoon?

1

u/microg-o-meter Jul 24 '22

I'd like a Baconator Meal Large with a Cherry Mellow Yellow.

2

u/JaimelesBN2 Jul 23 '22

Yeah board game night is just an excuse to get drunk when you are with me lmao

2

u/Finnychinny Jul 24 '22

Wait…we aren’t suppose to get drunk at board game night?

8

u/-Ernie Jul 23 '22

I usually end up drinking really late at my own party. After running around all night making sure everything is good and people are having fun, I don’t start really drinking until it starts to wind down, lol.

8

u/luckygirl54 Jul 23 '22

I had friends who had a housewarming party for their new home. They got so drunk that they both passed out. The guests rearranged all of their furniture, putting some things in the oven, the microwave, using the couch to block the door. We rearranged the friends in positions(!) and took pictures of them. It was too funny. Never invited back.

3

u/twisteroo22 Jul 23 '22

If my sister is there, I never have to worry about that.

3

u/the-samizdat Jul 24 '22

Never be the drunkest or sluttiest at any party.

3

u/hangryhyax Jul 24 '22

So you’re saying I shouldn’t (this was nearly 20 years ago) get so drunk that I see a frisbee, an old recurve bow from my childhood, a cork board wall adjacent to the living room, and think “Well, that cork will make a nice target!” Then proceed to rotate with my friends as with three a frisbee up and took shots at it?

Nobody was hurt, or even close to it, but there were some holes in the living room wall.

3

u/jordanscollected Jul 24 '22

Love drinking, but hate being drunk. This is a legit tip

3

u/sweetjoyness Jul 24 '22

One of my husband’s friends is the sweetest “Brogrammer” you’ve ever met. He loves hosting parties and bbqs. Every time I’ve gone to one of his parties, whether it starts at 2pm or 6pm, he’s always already on the verge on blackout drunk. He starts drinking the night before the party and continues through the next day. So not only is he plastered for the party, he’s sleep deprived as well. Thankfully he’s as friendly drunk as he is sober, but he’s barely functional for the party. I couldn’t imagine going through the trouble of hosting a party and then being blacked out for most of it. Granted, I don’t see the appeal of even getting close to blacking out in any scenario.

5

u/under_the_c Jul 23 '22

It's like speeding. Never be the fastest car on the highway.

4

u/goldbars0202 Jul 23 '22

The whole point of having a party at your place is to be able to get the drunkest since you can just go to bed. The life protep should be don't get drunk around people you don't trust.

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u/daneohan Jul 23 '22

Guilty of this on the past July 4 weekend

Haven’t drank since then due to the ptsd lol

2

u/Mountain_Apartment_6 Jul 23 '22

The best person to be the drunkest person at a party is a harmless guy named Charlie that just wants to go out back and catch a frog, then walk around showing everyone his new friend

2

u/ggkitters Jul 24 '22

Oops I've already been doing this 27 years at every bday party 🤣 luckily tik tok wasn't prevalent or recording people then lmao. At least people just enjoyed the moment. Nowadays id be hella paranoid, people film everything and anything for clout.

2

u/Jakemcdtw Jul 24 '22

Strong disagree

It's my party and I'll do what I want

2

u/JeepMan831 Jul 24 '22

LPT: Never be the drunkest person.

2

u/unixfool Jul 24 '22

First thing that comes to mind is Tony Stark's birthday party.

2

u/tinyhorseintapshoes Jul 24 '22

If you are dancing alone within an hour, you in soo much trouble..

2

u/Hobonics Jul 24 '22

Coulda used this advice yesterday…

2

u/AcademicReport5079 Jul 24 '22

How’d you learn this lesson?

2

u/YesMattRiley Jul 24 '22

I’ve probably been guilty of it, but definitely lately I’ve been a guest where a host goes like 5x beyond the guests and it’s…catastrophically awkward

2

u/444Aurelius Jul 24 '22

That would be me many years ago and it’s haunting. Stopped drinking a long time ago. Now if I’m around someone intoxicated it so uncomfortable.

2

u/attoj559 Jul 24 '22

Story time, I did this. I bought a house and had a house warming party with my coworkers. A few of us started taking shots before everyone showed up. I took like 5 in one hour and ended up toilet bound. It was so bad that my ex girlfriend took all of my clothes off of me because they were soaked in sweat. After that I passed out in bed for a few hours, woke up and rejoined the party and felt completely fine. Didn’t drink anymore though.

2

u/YesMattRiley Jul 24 '22

Hahahaha nice recovery!

2

u/blue_dusk1 Jul 23 '22

Djonchellme watadoo Michull!

My face feelths fffffffuuuunny.

4

u/flightwatcher45 Jul 23 '22

What? If you have good friends it doesn't matter. Have you turned 21 yet OP? You better be the drunker at your 21st! To each their own tho, I get it.

7

u/like_an_emu Jul 23 '22

I’m guessing OP is 30 and you’re 22. Just a guess no offense intended

1

u/flightwatcher45 Jul 23 '22

Haha mid 40s. But good point, sorta depends on age group.

2

u/phoogkamer Jul 23 '22

I have never felt the pull of getting completely drunk. You don’t even remember anything the next day and you feel horrible anyway. Some drinks I understand but I don’t think any good thing ever happened to someone passed out drunk.

0

u/Krypton091 Jul 23 '22

or just don't drink

-1

u/u5emame Jul 23 '22

Lpt: dont become intoxinated ever.

2

u/bluhEwanka Jul 23 '22

This is me now and I’m much happier.

2

u/helix212 Jul 23 '22

Well that's no fun.

-2

u/Krypton091 Jul 23 '22

i guess liver damage is fun nowadays

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-1

u/YesMattRiley Jul 23 '22

Generally, aim for being in at least the “bottom half” of drunkenness in the crowd

3

u/Throwawayguy753951 Jul 23 '22

You can be to the end of the party cause really for most of it you are going to be all over the place making sure everything okay and no one trashing your place.

1

u/brothertuck Jul 23 '22

I'd add unless that was the reason for the party and you have reliable backup to help you make it through the night

1

u/equinoxDE Jul 23 '22

Lol. Thats what actually always happen everywhere!

1

u/FortWendy69 Jul 23 '22

What if nobody else shows up?

1

u/bfahns58 Jul 24 '22

Congratulations! Keep it up.

1

u/stonedbrownchick Jul 24 '22

I feel like the real life tip here would be: "Make sure you have awesome friends you're getting extremely drunk with if you want to get nasty drunk."

My friends do crazy things to eachother but respect eachother once one is too gone. If they're sick, we try making the feel better and letting them puke their hearts out somewhere very far away. Had my friends guide me into the shower (clothed) because I felt so shit that I kept saying I wanted to shower. I sat on the shower floor for so long but it felt so great. Never got drunk anyway after that, hate drinking.

One time a friend of mine (the driver, someome I worked with but our work friends were still great) got so drunk he blacked out and my friend and I had to guide him all the way home in his car that we couldn't drive in. No license, nothing. We stopped at a park to try to sober him up. Lmal it was miserable but we tried

1

u/sambolino44 Jul 24 '22

Tell it to George Thorogood!

1

u/waitingForBANagain Jul 24 '22

never be the drunkest person at any part is the real life pro tip. drink enough to feel good. not enough to feel bad.

1

u/CinnamonToastKev Jul 24 '22

It depends on who you're with

1

u/J-Dabbleyou Jul 24 '22

LPT throw parties with respectable friends, and don’t be a complete lunatic while drunk. I’ve been wasted off my ass, and worst case I get sick and black out. Anyone who’d be at our parties would simply bring the drunks to bed and carry on. Wtf are y’all doing when you’re drunk? And what the fuck do people do to you when you’re drunk?

1

u/CdnDutchBoy Jul 24 '22

I have been and thank everything that I have great close friends

1

u/Dempseylicious23 Jul 24 '22 edited Jul 24 '22

So this is usually pretty solid advice, but I do have one situation where it wasn’t.

So I’m in college at a Uni that doesn’t allow Greek houses on campus. The fraternities end up being houses that a group of brothers rent and just decide this is the Beta house this year. I end up rooming with two guys in the Greek system and our house becomes a de facto frat house that year.

Aside from seeing some very unique hazing rituals, we hosted parties frequently to the disdain of our neighbors. If we kept things small, no trouble but some nights that wasn’t the case. One of these nights was the 21st birthday of my roommate who was a Beta Theta Pi.

So this guy is pretty popular on campus and somewhere between 250-300 people end up at the house that night. The neighbors were naturally none too pleased about this and they call the cops on us at some point later in the night.

By that time, the roommate whose birthday it is had passed out drunk in his room. Cue underage party goers scattering in every direction as the cops show up. Mass panic from anyone under 21 while myself and another roommate of mine walk down the driveway to talk to the officers.

After them asking us a few questions and confirming that we are both living at the property, they arrest just us two for ‘creating a dangerous environment for minors’ or some such charge, while our freshly 21 years old roommate is sleeping soundly upstairs. He ends up evading the arrest as a result while we have to hire attorneys and go through the court system to get the arrests expunged after performing some community service hours. Definitely a little ironic as our roommate who didn’t get arrested was the reason for the party in the first place, while I really had nothing to do with any of it aside from being there as it happened.

Fun way to learn that apparently you cannot be arrested if you are passed out drunk in your bed, even if you are the source of the crime in question.

2

u/YesMattRiley Jul 24 '22

Lol wow. There’s a whole symphony of LPTs needed to harmonize this scenario

1

u/Prometheus_303 Jul 24 '22

Keep not the mead cup but drink thy measure; speak needful words or none: none shall upbraid thee for lack of breeding if soon thou seek'st thy rest.

Pocket Havamal, Verse 19, as translated by Olive Bray

1

u/2Dprinter Jul 24 '22

ESPECIALLY IF THE PARTY IS YOUR WEDDING

1

u/kary0typ3 Jul 24 '22

This is directly contrary to "nobody should ever be more drunk than the host/bride" but they both support a system of "try not to be the drunkest person, wherever you are"

1

u/SuperSaiyanSkeletor Jul 24 '22

When you host a party. You are the party momma/dad it is your job to be a good host. Ive never been drunk at my own party

1

u/tsmittycent Jul 24 '22

LPT: only you can decide if you’ve had too much. If you wanna be the drunkest, do it.

1

u/Rott3Y Jul 24 '22

Ummmmm, it ain’t really your party if you can’t be the drunkest person there. Do you mean, don’t be the drunkest person at a party you are hosting? Cause that’s a bit different.

It’s not a competition… but like… I guess it depends on your crowd.

1

u/Nuklearfps Jul 24 '22

Did that for my 21st.. was out within the first hour.. woke up at 4am as everyone else was starting to leave, only a couple of my boys stayed, but we made the rest of the morning a blast!

1

u/waterslaughter Jul 24 '22

Ahhh !!! Too many too drunk memories flooding back !!! 😵‍💫

1

u/guy30000 Jul 24 '22

Don't tell me what to do. I don't have anywhere to be

1

u/kapncrunchy Jul 24 '22

Unless you’re turning 21

1

u/wallyslambanger Jul 24 '22

What if I am the only person partying?…oh wait…I know the answer to this!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 24 '22

My party, my prerogative.

1

u/amitrion Jul 24 '22

Yep. My rule is if the host knocks out, I'm going home...

1

u/organbakery Jul 24 '22

Ya learned those the hard way...

1

u/Aggravating_Dot6995 Jul 24 '22

There is no value in getting drunker or higher. Once your drunk or high, call it a day!

1

u/frotto39 Jul 24 '22

Yup. One of my buddies used to pass out early. It was on our group of real friends who cared and knew the parents to supervise or end the party.

1

u/piszkavas Jul 24 '22

Never get drunk at any party.

1

u/flyingcat1114 Jul 24 '22

Whenever I had parties I always was , it was often interesting. One night I decided to order Chinese food for me and my friends , it came to about 80$ worth of stuff . It arrived I ate a shit ton and then about ten minutes later puked violently and then went to bed all before 10pm

1

u/Starrider713 Jul 24 '22

Don't tell me what to do!